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Home Sweet Hollywood


By a show of hands, who here remembers playing with the other kids in their neighborhood?  Did you ever have a lemonade stand that the mailman (or, mailwoman, as it was in my childhood) frequented?  Did you ever collect your neighbor's newspaper or watch their dog while they were out of town?  Did you ride your bike to your friend's house a couple blocks away?  Did you play with the next door neighbor kids for hours on end?

If you raised your hands to all of these questions, then you must be an octopus.

Now, put your tentacles down and consider this:  Where do you live now?  Are you close with your neighbors?  Do you even know then?  Have they ever asked you to feed the cat while they're visiting relatives?  Have you been over to their house for a margarita or an iced tea on a summer evening?

Habibi and I don't know any of our neighbors.  We recognize them and exchange "hellos" in the hallways of our building, but I don't even know Mr. & Mrs. Hairy's real names (see "Refreshingly Maniacal").  It's a shame, because both of us come from communities where, even if you don't like your neighbors, you still invite them to the block party.

Habibi comes from a small town of about 4,000 people.  Everyone knows each other and each other's business.  This can be both a blessing and a curse, but nevertheless, people know people across town, so knowing your neighbors is an absolute given.  I, on the other hand, grew up in a suburb of a mid-size city-town.  I went away for a few years in college, but I ended up back at my parents' house for about a year after graduation.  Since then, obviously, I moved out, but I'm still only about a 20-minute drive from my childhood home where I babysat the neighbor's kids, took care of their dog, learned to drive and went on my first date.

So what happened?  Why is knowing our neighbors so unusual anymore?  Is the increased obsession with work, technology and "being busy" to blame?  Perhaps.  Perhaps not.  In any case, something has happened over time to cause this.  In the mid-size city-towns, knowing your neighbors simply isn't as much of a given anymore.  I still think this occurs in small towns, but the number of people who know their neighbors in mid-size communities is decreasing.  This doesn't even begin to address the unneighborly relations between big city dwellers.

I miss knowing my neighbors, but I have to admit, I spend more time with our TV (and we don't even have basic channels!) than I do with the man next door; I have only seen him thrice in the eight months that we have lived in this apartment.  Consequently, the faces I see on TV and in movies have become my virtual neighbors.

So would you like a tour of our beautiful Hollywood home?  Of course you would.  Come have a look around.  Maybe I can even introduce you to our neighbors!


Home Sweet Home
We have one in L.A. and another in N.Y.C.*




This is Denzel.
He keeps an eye on the place when we're on vacation.
This is Bill.
He helps us maintain a nice yard.



This is Cliff.
He is our mailman.  Cliff loves his job.


This is Halle.
She takes care of Betty when we are out of town visiting family.
This is Leo and Kate.
They are our plumbers.
This is Snoop.
Sometimes he walks our (imaginary) dog(g) when we are out of town.

This is Jack.
He is our paper boy.  We give him a bonus every Christmas.

This is Mrs. Featherbottom.
She babysits our (hypothetical) kids.

Y'all come on back now, y'hear?


*365 Pet Peeves, www.the-ez.blogspot.com


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