David Hasselhoff Goes To My Gym And I Am Not A Liar This Is Just The Sort Of Celebrity Lifestyle I Lead
You: But why, Anouchka, would The Hoff be vacationing in your generic, Midwestern town in February?
Me: Well, apparently it's beautiful this time of year! (Seriously. It is in the 50s today. Unheard of.)
You: OK, OK. But how do you know that it wasn't just some muscly old guy with a corny David Cassidy grin and a pair of outdated sunglasses?
Me: Ever heard of a little something called intuition? Well I have. Plus, he was carrying a life saving floatation device and sun tan lotion. And his hair was impeccably mussed.
You: I call bullshit.
Me: Would I lie to you?
You: Yes.
Me: OK, maybe I would and maybe I am, but I know what I saw and this is it:
What the hell? How was this ever "a thing"? |
OK fine. Since I am allegedly a liar (prove it), here is how I will make it up to you: I am conducting some scientific (a.k.a. IMDB & Wikipedia) research on my computer at work to present you with a few Hasselhoff factoids, for your reading enjoyment. I know I will catch hell for this from the IT department at work (where they can monitor my internet activity and see that I am conducting searches for David Hasselhoff), but this is how much I love you. You're welcome.
- Once explained on a talk show about being attacked by a male kangaroo at a wildlife preserve.
- Was considered for the role for Boba Fett in Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980).
- In Germany, he shares his dubbing voice with Kermit the Frog.
- Helped to rescue a car crash victim. [March 1995]
- Saved a drowning child. [August 1995]
- On August 2, 2006, Hasselhoff proclaimed himself "King of the Internet" in a tongue-in-cheek advertisement commercial for Pipex.
- Hasselhoff has launched a MySpace-like social networking site, known as "HoffSpace." (This makes it infinitely less funny, but: He did so in part as a response to people opening false social-networking pages in his name, as well as those of his children.)
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