According to experienced bloggers, one of the best ways to
get people to read your blog is to browse others and leave intelligent comments
that show you are interested in what they have to say. In an effort to win popularity, I do this
shamelessly. Alas, despite my best
efforts, I have not built up much of a following, but I will not stop yet! After all, I have only been blogging for
about a month…. :)
In any case, this past Friday as I sat “working” at my desk I
found myself perusing other blogs. I
came across one with a French title (it was highlighted on Blogger’s “Blogs of
Note”) and was naturally intrigued. I
clicked the link, only to have a HUGE picture of Shia LaBoeuf pop up on my
screen. Apparently, he has quite a big
fan out there! Normally, this really
wouldn’t bother me, but my boss just so
happened to pick that very moment to emerge from his office, the prime location
to see my computer screen. (FML.)
How many of you out there have great situations in life that
absolutely bore you? Let me clarify: I have a flexible job, excellent hours,
fantastic co-workers, decent pay and I even see the value in what I do… but I
am so disinterested in it. Unfortunately, I have felt that way in some
form or other at every job I have ever had.
In fact, I have had so many jobs that when I recently hit the one year
mark at my current place of employment, I felt as though I should have been
congratulated and offered a retirement package.
(By the way, I’m still waiting on that.)
I described it to Habibi like this:
One of the main reasons I don’t want to apply for another job some day
is because I am so tired of writing down all past employment on applications.
On a related subject, Habibi and I are bracing ourselves to make a
number of other big life decisions, all of which will affect each other. In fact, each decision not only depends on
the outcome of the one that precedes it, but also on the one that follows it. Needless to say, I personally feel like I’m
running in circles. Yet this isn’t the
part that bothers me. The worst part
about the whole thing is that there is nothing
we can do about it right now except wait.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I am terribly excited for our life changes
and look forward to starting a new chapter with great eagerness and
anticipation. On the other hand, I have
never not known what the next step
would be. Even if I knew what I’d hoped
it would be would never come to fruition, I still had goals. Some of these ambitions were flat out
unattainable, but they were mine and I worked toward them all the same.
When I was a junior in college, I took a card-making class
with my mom while I was home on Christmas break. She introduced me to a woman in her class who
had been a French major herself, years before. Eager to meet someone who shared my interests, I smiled cheerily,
held out my hand and told her that I was studying French as well. I will never forget what she said: “I don’t really speak it anymore. I haven’t practiced in so long that I forgot
most of it.”
I remember thinking to myself I will never let that happen to me before merrily going my way. Although this short conversation hasn’t come
to mind in quite awhile, you know what French words come to mind now when I think back on my
reaction? Naïve, touché, cliché.
As I grow older (and somewhat more cynical), I am finding
that I have a rather worthless degree; in hindsight, I wouldn’t change a thing.
:) I love speaking French, even
if it is diminished to nothing more than a party trick. (Suck on that,
grouchy card-making lady!) We all
spend money on the things in which we find our own worth and value. For me, that was a French degree. Yet now, I do believe that I will have to
find another -non-professional- outlet for it.
For the moment, I am finding satisfaction in achieving goals in running (mainly the way it makes my legs
look) and writing.
I mentioned in my very first post that my blogging is
primarily for me, but I like to pretend that someone out there is actually
listening to me. For those of you who
are, merci beaucoup. :)
I'm listening! and I love it!
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