Good morning and happy Tuesday! Tuesdays are my favorite day of the week (other than Friday, of course) because Tuesdays are DATE NIGHT with my hubby. (Je t'aime, habibi!) I am typically chipper on Tuesdays because I get excited about our outings or even about staying in. This is one day when I am particularly happy to be married. Today, however, I had an added bonus to make me relieved to be off the market...
Once again, I was out for my usual morning torture (run). I was enjoying the brisk morning, the cool breeze in my (disgustingly) sweaty face and the absence of thought as I listened to my feet on the pavement. I was feeling extra joyful because my underoos weren't even riding today! HUZZAH! Alas, this serenity could not last forever.
Ladies, how often do you experience the honking horns and loud comments when you run? I am disappointed to say that this is not a first-time experience for me. I must admit that the first time, I wondered if I had violated some runners' traffic law, but then realized how stupid that was. Although I am not exactly intimidated by this form of harassment, I do find it irritating. I mean, I know my delicate perspiration (not) and brightly colored mismatched clothes are irresistible, but please, do try and keep it to a minimum. However, I must ask my suitors, Do my tennis shoes really scream street-walker? Has this yelling out the window at women ever worked for you before? Are you feeling bold today because you're in a car, safe from the possibility that a woman might actually approach you? What would you do if she did? Instead of honking horns and making lewd comments, I'd suggest you do something about that adult acne and get yourself a training bra, because clearly, you aren't man enough for this.
I consider myself very blessed to have found and married the man of my dreams. But what is it with all the douche bags out there? To all of my single readers, I apologize on behalf of everyone else. Although you will never find me yelling out the window at you as you go about your daily activities (unless you are, in fact, violating some runners' traffic law), I am embarrassed to admit that this behavior exists. So please, enjoy the single life and never settle for Ol' Woody-At-Every-Skirt-Sighting. To all of my readers in relationships, please give your honey a squeeze tonight and make sure that he isn't in league with the Drive-by Idiot Parade. If he is, paint his back porch red.
Once again, I was out for my usual morning torture (run). I was enjoying the brisk morning, the cool breeze in my (disgustingly) sweaty face and the absence of thought as I listened to my feet on the pavement. I was feeling extra joyful because my underoos weren't even riding today! HUZZAH! Alas, this serenity could not last forever.
Ladies, how often do you experience the honking horns and loud comments when you run? I am disappointed to say that this is not a first-time experience for me. I must admit that the first time, I wondered if I had violated some runners' traffic law, but then realized how stupid that was. Although I am not exactly intimidated by this form of harassment, I do find it irritating. I mean, I know my delicate perspiration (not) and brightly colored mismatched clothes are irresistible, but please, do try and keep it to a minimum. However, I must ask my suitors, Do my tennis shoes really scream street-walker? Has this yelling out the window at women ever worked for you before? Are you feeling bold today because you're in a car, safe from the possibility that a woman might actually approach you? What would you do if she did? Instead of honking horns and making lewd comments, I'd suggest you do something about that adult acne and get yourself a training bra, because clearly, you aren't man enough for this.
I consider myself very blessed to have found and married the man of my dreams. But what is it with all the douche bags out there? To all of my single readers, I apologize on behalf of everyone else. Although you will never find me yelling out the window at you as you go about your daily activities (unless you are, in fact, violating some runners' traffic law), I am embarrassed to admit that this behavior exists. So please, enjoy the single life and never settle for Ol' Woody-At-Every-Skirt-Sighting. To all of my readers in relationships, please give your honey a squeeze tonight and make sure that he isn't in league with the Drive-by Idiot Parade. If he is, paint his back porch red.
Love. This. Post.
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