Anouchka Talks

*I didn't open the microwave fast enough, so I had to hear all four of the reminder beeps. *I parked between a Maserati and Porsche and now I feel embarrassed for driving a Mercedes. *Chipotle was full so I had to share a table with some strangers like it was the first Thanksgiving. *My drive to work isn’t long enough for my heated seat to fully heat. *My cab driver just farted. *My gold pocket watch is inconvenient. *I had to walk into the bank this morning like some kind of #$%^*(*^& animal. (Taken from  http://www.reddit.com/r/firstworldproblems) Happy weekend, everyone!

On a bright and beautiful morning such as today, I rather enjoy my drive to work.   Sick of NPR at the moment, I decided to roll down the windows and flip through the radio stations.   As I landed on (and listened to) stations playing Uncle Kracker and Gary Wright’s Dream Weaver (shut up), it suddenly occurred to me:   I have never smoked pot. Oddly enough, Habibi and I had a discussion about this the other day.   I have no desire to damage my body by filling it with unsavory toxins and poisons, but as the model teenager that I was (haha!) I can’t help but wonder what I missed.   In college, I did my share of stupid things that truly make me believe that the good Lord was watching out for me, yet by comparison to many of my peers, I was still relatively “PG.”   I won’t try to brag about my escapades (they would more than likely bore most of my minute readership) but do you ever just wonder, What if? I am delighted by the way that my life has turned out, but I think I woul

Earlier this week, I received a text from Habibi.  Every so often, I will get a midday text saying, "I love you," or "I hope you're having a wonderful day."  These always make me a little bit giddy, so when I saw that my beloved had sent me a message, I opened it with fervor. While the message contained a species of fervor, it did not mirror my own.  In fact, it read nothing more than "MCRIB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" ATTENTION ALL AMERICANS:  THE MCRIB IS BACK AT MCDONALD'S!!!!! While I do not partake in this much anticipated American custom (remember, I don't eat dead pig corpses), Habibi awaits it the same way a Disney fanatic would go bananas over a DVD being released from the infamous vault.  As we were out and about yesterday morning, we had a discussion about this legendary sandwich.  It was only 9 in the morning, a full hour and a half before McDonald's even begins serving items on their regular menu, when Habibi stated his inn

Well, the weekend is now officially over. It may seem strange to say that on a Thursday, but I feel like it’s Monday.  My so-called weekend began last Friday when Habibi and I made a change of plans because of a death in the family.  If you read my most recent post, you will know that we have had back-to-back funerals and mourning-type festivities since last Friday.  Almost an entire week later, we are beginning to exhale.  Between getting the news of two deaths on Friday, viewings on Sunday and Tuesday, funerals on Monday and Wednesday, spending hundreds of miles in our dirty little car and nothing but junk food to eat to top it all off, we are –needless to say– so tired our brains hurt.  When it rains, it pours!  (Poor Habibi had to start his new job today too, but I hear it went well.  Hooray!!!!!!!!!!) However, if anyone can put the “fun” into fun eral, it’s my family.  After a touching ceremony filled with endearing (and often entertaining) stories of my aunt, we al

Habibi and I were planning on company this weekend; his mom and grandparents were to drive the three and a half hours from their small hometown to visit.  But my, how our plans have changed.... On Thursday night, Habibi's great uncle (his grandpa's brother) died after struggling with various health complications for some time.  Naturally, this changed the weekend agenda, so we decided that we would make the trip back to be with the family and attend the funeral.  Shortly after our surprise arrival at his grandparents' home, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize. Normally, I don't pick up the phone and just let anonymous callers leave me a voice mail, but this time I bit the bullet.  Praise the Lord I did because it was my aunt (my mom's sister) calling to tell me that my other aunt (I called her Tante , French for   "aunt") had been out walking when she was hit by a truck and killed. I later learned that October 14 is the 27

I had to peel myself out of bed 30 minutes early today to drop my husband's dry cleaning off on time.  But then, when I got there, THE DRIVE THROUGH DROP OFF WAS CLOSED!  I had to get out of my car! (My dear friend, Stacie )

Last night I went out with one of my closest friends for frozen yogurt.  Obviously, this meant that I had to have a snack immediately after arriving home.  I won't tell you what it was (more yogurt) but let's just say no osteoporosis for this girl!  (Quit judging me.  I hate you.) Unfortunately for my friend, her car decided not to start, so I drove us.  After our evening of deliciously flavored live cultures (the only living thing I will ever eat...I hope), I drove her to her parents' house so she could borrow a car.  As luck would have it, her parents just moved this past summer to a part of town that I don't know very well (nevermind the fact that it is literally a hop, skip and a jump from where I work). For those of you who know me, you will know that I have zero sense of direction.  Allow me to submit the following:  Several years ago, I spent St. Patrick's Day in Dublin.  While there, some friends and I toured the Guinness Brewery.  At the top of the bre

I have to hold my breath when I exit my apartment because the hallway in my building smells like a combination of a dog who rolled in its own crap and a cheese factory.

When I was just a little tike, I learned a song about Halloween.  The lyrics went something like this: Jack-O-Lantern, Jack-O-Lantern, You are such a pretty sight, As you sit there in the window, Looking out on the night! You were once a yellow pumpkin, Growing on a sturdy vine. Now you are a Jack-O-Lantern, See the candlelight shine! I know it isn't exactly Hemingway (thank goodness), but poor Habibi found me singing it to myself in the bathroom this morning as I was getting ready for the day.  (Oh, shut up.)  For your enjoyment (obviously) I've included the inspiration for my morning concert below: WE GOT TO CARVE OUR PUMPKIN LAST NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! I love Halloween.  Every year around this time I start to get the jitters as though something terribly exciting and adventurous is about to happen.  I love the crunch of fall leaves, crispy mornings, eerie evenings and smoky nights.  Spooky stories, haunted houses, the smell of a campfire an

According to experienced bloggers, one of the best ways to get people to read your blog is to browse others and leave intelligent comments that show you are interested in what they have to say.  In an effort to win popularity, I do this shamelessly.  Alas, despite my best efforts, I have not built up much of a following, but I will not stop yet!  After all, I have only been blogging for about a month…. :) In any case, this past Friday as I sat “working” at my desk I found myself perusing other blogs.  I came across one with a French title (it was highlighted on Blogger’s “Blogs of Note”) and was naturally intrigued.  I clicked the link, only to have a HUGE picture of Shia LaBoeuf pop up on my screen.  Apparently, he has quite a big fan out there!  Normally, this really wouldn’t bother me, but my boss just so happened to pick that very moment to emerge from his office, the prime location to see my computer screen.  (FML.) How many of you out there have great situations in lif

My iPhone has a cracked screen.  Now I can only play the first levels of Angry Birds. (Paraphrased from a discussion on my favorite morning radio show)

Generally speaking, politics bore me.  As a result, those closest to me are often astounded by my apparent indifference toward the individuals holding various offices in our nation's government.  How can I not be concerned with _____?  It affects me somehow because of some direct or indirect correlation that I should know about  because of the Constitution and taxes and government spending and jobs social justice amnesty founding fathers immigration George Washington borders religion rights terrorism.  AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In my defense, I must say that just because I don't follow politics as closely as some doesn't mean that I don't care.  For this reason, I have prepared the following rebuttal to any future accusations of ambivalence. Politics in Anouchka's Week Sunday Someone mentioned the Arab Spring.  I am now craving the Lebanese food that I get for special occasions and at family reunions. Monday Habibi and I went to see the movie Th

When Habibi and I were first dating, I mentioned to him that I was not interested in ever owning a home.  A mortgage and a toaster simply weren't for me. Fast forward a couple of years and nothing has really changed.  Although we do, in fact, own a toaster (because what red-blooded American doesn't like toast?), neither of us is really all that interested in home ownership.  Despite all of this, there is one aspect of being a home owning American that appeals to me:  a washing machine. Since our marriage two years ago, we have lived in two different apartments, both of which have coin operated laundry facilities in the building, but no option of installation of a W/D in the individual units.  For those of you who have experienced this sort of living situation, it isn't particularly dream worthy.  (First World Problem, anyone?)  Walking up and down flights of stairs every 30 minutes, hauling a heaping basket of clothes and praying that you have sufficient quarters ( and

Two years ago today the most wonderful event of my life took place... That's right, folks!  I got hitched !  I will do my best not to get sappy and emotional in this post, but I really and truly am delighted to tell you that I married my prince charming, the man of my dreams, my knight in shining armor (and all of those other corny descriptions). To celebrate, this past weekend Habibi took me camping.  To give you an idea of where I stand on camping, a co-worker asked me this week what kind of tent we had.  The only response I could think of was "a red one...BUT IT HAS A PORCH!!!"  Clearly, camping is not typically my thing, although I have experienced it in the past. : Before we put on the rain fly, creating our "porch" Luckily for us, my sister lives near the location where we camped, so we were able to use her shower the following morning.  (We really had to "rough it.")  For the sake of my own laziness, I won't be giving you a