Anouchka Talks

Habibi and I were invited to a gala.   A friggin' GALA, y'all!!!   The NPO that I work for is hosting its centennial celebration this year and a couple of the members decided to sponsor our attendance because they are saints who know that we are poor. I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am for this event.  Not only is it a night out with my main squeeze, but check this out:  it's cocktails, hors d'oeuvres, a four-course gourmet dinner with French wine pairings (!), and entertainment.  Plus it's being held at this swanky modern art gallery which makes it feel v. Sex and the City  to me.  What really makes it the bee's knees is that it even has valet.  I can picture myself now, decked out in some bedazzled gown, throwing my keys to some college kid and saying "not a scratch on her, young man!"  It'll be just like in the movies.  I'll be James Bond and Habibi will be my hot piece of ass. But wait a minute.  I don't own a bedazzled go